When you’re becoming a mom, everything is changing anyway. Why not finally commit to becoming that person you want to be? Change your eating habits, exercise, garden… start that creative business you’ve been dreaming about… whatever that impulse has been directing you toward – now’s the time!
Just kidding. I know it’s not that easy. In fact, the truth is, in my experience it’s almost impossible to change old patterns… unless you have support, including this simple trick.
You MUST use this thing (or something like it) to be able to get beyond your ego. The ego is what drives most of us our whole lives. Not the healthy, Freudian ego we want – I’m talking here about apart of ourselves that does nothing but protect us from change.
Here’s a way to understand this: our ego is like a guard dog, tied up on a porch, protecting everything it thinks is inside. Like most dogs (sorry, dog lovers, I’m more of a cat person), he’s not all that smart. But he is well meaning and lovable. He just wants to keep everything exactly as it is, or as he thinks it is. So, he protects the stories that we tell ourselves in our heads: I am not enough; I can’t do this; I’m better than her; I don’t have what it takes to accomplish something like that; I need to get to this place and then I’ll be happy. Just stories.
But the dog – our ego – thinks they’re real. They’ve been around for a long time, right? And whatever has to be said to keep you from changing, the ego will bark it at you:
You don’t have enough money! Time! Creativity! Willpower! Give it up, the dog says. What he’s really saying is: stay here with me where it’s safe and familiar.
Now, on the other side of the porch, is our furry cat. Happy, blissful, kind of passive (ok, I’ll be fair and criticize cats too – kind of detached). The cat doesn’t care about any outcome: she is happy just to notice things, smell the air, and let things be.
This cat in Yoga represents the Ground of Being – we access this part of ourselves when we close our eyes and go into the bliss of the heart by meditating. She purrs when we pet her, but even when we don’t, she is content just being.
If we make decisions from either of these places – the frightened dog or the complacent cat – well, we’re either going to be incredibly limited, or detached from life’s possibilities.
BUT. You get to make decisions that will evolve you forward, YOU, and only YOU, must sit on the front steps of your house. The part of you that knows you are the OWNER of these animals, and not the servant of you, is your Divine Ma Self. Also referred to as the Evolutionary Self, by Craig Hamilton, this is the part of you that knows you can be happy RIGHT NOW, just by leaning toward who you want to become!
You can have your beloved dog and cat behind you, and love them fully, but you must remember that it’s YOUR house. You sit, excited about what is possible. You might notice an area in the yard where beautiful flowers are wanting to come up – you get up and clear the way, weeding and making space. You look for beauty, goodness and truth where it may arise, and you co-participate with it.
OK, and here’s the trick, because sometimes we try to get up and the dog barks and we stop because maybe he’s right… and the cat purrs and we think maybe we’ll just hang out. But then.. nothing changes. So, at last, here it is:
REMEMBER THAT YOU ARE NOT CHANGING JUST FOR YOU. You are paving the way for your child. Your child will learn to move, breathe, and make decisions by just being around you.
No matter what you say, and what you teach your child, it’s who you are that is going to have the greatest affect.
I hope that motivates you this week to step onto the path of your own personal evolution each day. Don’t let your ego dog hold you back from moving your life in the direction you want it to go. Don’t let the cat keep you in a state of passive contentment. There is always more to discover: more ways to step into your Divine Feminine power, if not just for your own happiness, then for your child’s.
Here are 3 of the Yoga Lifestyle Habits that I created as a Mom to help me have more energy and sleep better – don’t wait like I did! Consider starting one of them now:
1.) I do some yoga (any movement is good!) in the mornings. It starts me in the right place for good decisions, being open to possibility, feeling good in my body and just getting in a good mood. Now my daughter knows that we start our day by moving our bodies.
2.) I try to get fruits and greens in me first thing, to awaken my intelligent cravings for the day. Click here to find out everything you need to know for a simple Green Smoothie.
3.) I meditate at night before bed. It helps me sleep deeply and get back to sleep when I wake up in the middle of the night. Click here for an easy meditation for busy moms.